Always Waiting - Rather Be Moving
The frantic work for refi is possibly all for nought. The $700 spent for appraisal and condo docs may have just been thrown away. I'm still waiting and being asked to spend more money to improve that credit score just a few more points. Meanwhile I'm going broke doing it. This isn't helping I don't think.
So I wait - wait to figure out what to do; wait to win the lottery to be able to finish my home (of course one needs to play to win right?); wait to take a vacation; wait to buy a new air conditioner; wait to feel less financial stress. Thanks J.
Of course I know these are mostly first-world problems and I should be grateful I have plenty to eat, a safe and healthy environment to live in, anything I actually need and loving friends and family. And I am grateful.
Meanwhile I'm also waiting for other non-material things:
My health. My injured calf keeps me from running. I was able to do yoga on Marco but I'm in Kentucky and I'm going to have to make it up at home. Should be interesting. It's frustrating - but I AM getting more sleep. Normally when in my hometown, I would be up at 4:30 running with my sister Chelle.
My life. Still sort of waiting to see where it takes me and how it intertwines with other people's lives - my family, B, etc. I used to be able to look ahead in life and imagine my world - I don't now. I just live day by day. Maybe that's the best way? I don't know.
For now, I'll just wait for my nieces and nephews and other siblings to arrive for my nephew's wedding - and I'll enjoy every minute with them.
If I were to write in a blog, this would sum up the last 6 years of my life. Day by day is all you can take it at and wishful thinking on that lottery gives you some sort of hope though it may only be 1 in 8,987,538. I find if you can even find 30 seconds in your day that you feel at peace, i.e. Sunset, deep breath, standing in sand, a hike, a walk, looking up at the sky or simply the flowers, if it gives you peace in the littlest bit, there just might be a sense of stress less times... I find if my shoulders drop and I let out a deep breath, it soothes at least a little bit.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, Girl. XOXO
Janelle