Electricity E-Lectricity

Switch Switch - I Think It Works

Last week I changed out a receptacle after remembering that J and I put a dimmer on the switch connected to the garbage disposal!

Since we were nowhere near having a working sink and disposal at the time we realized that's what the switch went to, we just left it. But now I'm close - so close - to having a fully functioning kitchen, that I thought I better change it.

I can't help but sing the old Schoolhouse Rock cartoon about electricity: "Electricity. E-Lectricity. It's Powerful stuff so watch that plug."

Makes me a little nervous - as it should I guess. I went about handling this task on a Friday before heading out with my Mom, Jess and Kate and their moms to a wine and painting party. I was determined to tackle something in the condo after work, after a run and before going out.

I turned off the power and tested it with my non-contact voltage  tester - Jess's husband Chris advised me which one to buy. Um - it was still on! I turned off everything in the kitchen and living room and tested again. No power. Phew.

I got out my handy rechargeable-battery-operated flash light that came with my cordless drill and took the cover plate off. I studied the existing receptacle - hoping this would be easy as my first one since J had many months ago pulled out the old one and figured out the wiring to put in the pretty black switch - it was just the wrong pretty black switch.

Hmmm, I thought as I sat atop my plywood counter top staring at the wires and my "Wiring" book. B walked in about the time I started this - perhaps mildly entertained that I was standing in shorts and Ugg boots, leaving over the plywood trying to figure this out., seeming unconcerned I was dealing with electrical components and never doubting I could do it. That boosted my confidence and made me more determined to figure it out.

The switch I took out had wires coming from it while the switch I was putting in had none. One wire the switch connected to inside the box was green - the ground wire - and there were two red ones! The book said one was supposed to be white and one black. Head scratching.

The ground wire was frayed so I needed to cut off the end and strip some of the rubber casing to exposed more wire. I had just purchased wire strippers suspecting I might need them. The only problem of course was that I didn't know how to use them - I kept cutting through the wire and started to worry that I was going to make it too short to use. B  said he thought you were supposed to gently twist around the wire then pull off the rubber. Oh yeah - I do remember seeing that or maybe even doing that a couple of times when hooking up stereo speakers a gazillion years ago. So that worked!

Next I used needle nose pliers to bend the wire around the ground wire screw on the receptacle.

But what about these other wires?! I did the same with those and wrapped around the live screws hoping I had the correct wire on the correct screw.

Meanwhile, I was talking aloud about what I was doing and thinking. B said from the couch, "If I weren't here, would you still be talking out loud?"

"Of course I would!"

"OK, moment of truth," I said, ready to flip the circuit breaker and see if my switch switchery worked. Then it dawned on me - I had no way of testing whether the switch worked because the garbage disposal was still in a box on the floor and neither that nor the sink were hooked up.

D'oh! Well that was kind of a waste of time. I certainly could have chosen a project that had immediate impact.

Such a Kyle thing to do.

At least I have tried out the new tools and I know how to fix the problem if when I finally hook up the disposal (or plumber Chuck does - hopefully this week), it doesn't work. Or at least I think I do.

And because I know you have the song in your head, here you go.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLuPNThw0RE

Dimmer not needed for garbage disposal!

Essentials: basic switch, wiring picture-book

Handy life-saving voltage tester

  

The dimmer

Switch in place!

Can't turn it on from here

 If the switch works, next is this scary-looking one below - to separate the fan and the light from the existing single dimmer switch in the powder room.

Apparently , someone was overzealous about adding dimmers.

The Thrill Of The Nail Gun, And Other Scary Things

Trim And I

I learned to use my Brad nailer.

It's kind of thrilling.

There's a lot to it though - not really the pulling of the trigger but setting it up with the air compressor. I had no idea all that went into maintaining an air compressor and making sure you don't blow it up!

So I got all worked up to put some trim up in my powder room. But because it's me, I was so focused on the use of the gun and setting everything up that I didn't check the nail length verses the door jam where I was hanging the trim. I assumed wrongly that J had purchased nails for the gun that were perfect for the project at hand - the reason for the nail gun purchase. They were too long. Discovered by my friend Lisa when she stopped by for a visit this week. She went to close the pocket door in the bathroom and the nails slowed and scraped the door. Terrific .

The next day, I went to Ace (I'm almost famous there for all my projects and mishaps), bought a small pry bar and smaller nails - after I learned I needed to say they are for a gun. I didn't know there were Brad nails that didn't go in a Brad nail gun. The clerk kept showing me regular nails and kept saying, no Brad nails. Now I know.

A few days later I found a few minutes, pried off the trim using the pry bar and a paint scraper. I didn't break any of the trim! I pulled out what nails I could and then used my Dremel tool to cut off the rest. I put the shorter nails into the gun and reinstalled the trim. Then I repainted the door. 
So I'm back to square one in the powder room - kind of. I mean part of the trim is up at least - woo hoo.

After I had the two side pieces up that J stained and cut originally, I realized the top piece hadn't been cut. There are two more full pieces of stained but uncut trim and one not stained. My next gig will be to learn to cut the trim and learn to stain so I can finish the project - putting trim on the outside of the door too.

Others Live In The Disarray Like I Do - Kind Of

Someone Who Gets It

Since this blog also is about healing my heart, I'm going to talk a little bit about B. He might cringe at this. I probably won't publish this. But maybe I will.

B moved to this island like I did - after a lifetime of visiting - and moved into a condo his parents owned and use mostly as a rental property. He has continued with the job he had up North while searching for a place to buy in this area.

Two years ago, that was me exactly.B bought a foreclosed condo. Ditto.
 B is now finding himself overwhelmed by the projects at hand to make improve his condo as he tries to work, make friends, get to know the area and workout. Ditto.

Having that in common certainly doesn't make for a match but it does make for some common interests and problems that we share. It's nice to go to his place and see the disarray and to see the completion of projects such as when he installed his new dishwasher last weekend. I was there for the end of it - helping a very little bit - but getting to cheer him on when it was finished. I love that feeling of accomplishment. He was very proud and should have been!

It has been refreshing and comforting to hang out with B - (I haven't asked him if I can write about him so an initial will have to do for now). While he doesn't have the baggage of a J and K in his life, we're sort of on the same page in our lives - except he has also added the stress of a new career to the mix.

But he's not a project himself. I mean we all are in a way, aren't we? Growing, changing, amending ourselves as we move through life.

I think I give myself a little slack now knowing it's OK to live in a bit of chaos with boxes still unpacked, nothing totally finished and little free time. My friends aren't judging me for how long it is taking me to finish this place and they come by when they have time - we are all strapped for free time. B visits here without judgment - at least it's mostly clean if a bit of an obstacle course to get through. And I don't judge his place. I can see the potential. I went over last week and it was already much improved! He's moving along faster over there than I am - but I'm not comparing. Like yoga, this isn't a competition.

I am enjoying whatever this is and getting to know each other. I think I can speak for him in this instance in that he is enjoying this too.  To personify "this" -  it's smart, funny, fun, silly, comforting, unpredictable, surprising. I'm not here making a declaration of any kind; that might scare us both - haha. But whatever it is, I like it. And damaged as my head and heart still might be, they are on the mend for sure. 

Another Project, Another Mishap

No But Really - I'm Kind of a Walking Hazard

So what I'm saying is if I can do all this, anyone can. Or at least can try.

I laugh at myself even in frustration because it's all just mostly ridiculous - and something, and often so very basic, to learn.

Today, for example, I decided on short break from work, to install a smoke detector downstairs. There's one upstairs but hasn't been one downstairs since I moved in in September 2014 - yikes! There's no excuse, I bought a smoke detector and a carbon monoxide alarm way back when - they've been sitting in a box. Shame on me. Glad I'm not dead.

But back to the mishaps.

* Tried three different drill bits until I finally made the correct sized hole for the anchors. Repeated this on the carbon monoxide alarm - you'd think I would have learned.

* "Lightly tap anchor with hammer if needed." Instead, I beat it into submission until it was warped and bent and useless. I had to remove it with needle-nose pliers and try again with a different anchor.

* Accidentally kicked plastic container of screws and anchors, sending them flying all over the living room.

* Stripped screws supplied with the smoke detector by using a drill with screw driver bit a little too enthusiastically. Grabbed other screws but then the smoke detector wouldn't attach properly because I didn't use flat screws - these had some depth to them. Removed them, found some flat screws and replaced them.

Tripping through life and doing everything twice because that's how I roll. 

No matter - smoke detector and carbon monoxide alarm are up and working! Here's the proof:

Almost A Kitchen. Almost There

A Sink for My Birthday

"Either I will find a way, or I will make one." - Philip Sidney

My beautiful stainless steal farmhouse sink has a home now.

For my birthday, friends on vacation gave up their time to build me a kitchen and mount my sink. It's now ready for the plumber and the ridiculous faucet!

Imagine if you will the happiness and joy of cartwheels, confetti and a Phish-show worthy amount of balloons.

This is better.

Brad and Marc managed to divide and conquer a bit - with both working on readying their condo for incoming renters and then splitting up so Marc could work on my kitchen and Brad on theirs.

We had discussed the kitchen project many times over the past many months. Brad and his wife, Karen, and their kids, Faith and Dylan, had been over helping with several smaller projects during the holidays. Marc's wife Lynn so sweetly saved some magazines with great ideas in them  - that sadly I never remembered to get at New Years. I remember the drift wood table idea though and I'm working on it (drift wood photo to come).

My biggest contributions to this epic project were giving Marc a sounding board as he figured out how to create what I wanted and buying plywood - actually Dad bought the plywood for me for my birthday when we went to pick it up in his vehicle. Seriously, about all I can offer are pictures. On the second day, I went upstairs and put laundry away while Marc worked. He said figuring out how to build a structure to mount the sink was mentally taxing and the most difficult part of all of it.

I had the wood for the base of the counter tops - nice cedar that J picked out. He did get a template together that laid the foundation for the rest of the kitchen. And I have a nice miter saw that I actually own with my friend Guy. We each had smaller saws. I put them both on a local yard sale Web site and after selling them we bought a larger miter saw.

The plywood serves as the counter top now and will either stay as a base for permanent tops or become scrap wood. Linda at the local lumber yard came up with a brilliant idea for using the wood for counter tops when they aren't sealed and therefore aren't smooth and can't be cleaned: vinyl tablecloths! That'll work for now until I can decide what kind of wood I want or whether I want to go crazy and use concrete. Struggling with this decision - have to save money for it too.

Marc working out the details for the sink

Smoke-filled room after borrowed circular saw had blade in backward - Karl!

OMG it's a counter top!

Yes!

Yay!

First meal being cooked in the new kitchen - tomato and rice soup. Want the recipe? Just ask. 

Perfect spot for birthday flowers - thank you Brendan

A few days later I also completed that pocket door project I started a few weeks ago. After trying everything to get the stripped screws out and having others try, I gave up and bought the $22 tool kit the nice guy at Ace recommended. I did question him about why the more expensive one was better vs the Ace brand - 3 sizes vs 2.

 

Matchy

Matchy

Every day I am reminded of how blessed I am. I am thankful for friends and family and this beautiful place where I live. I'm sure I don't always show it but I feel it every single day.

It's in that everyday thankfulness, I realize how stupid I was to allow myself to be separated from friends - just by not hanging out with them as much - or in some cases at all - because J had a problem with them. He certainly wanted me to believe that just about every person I was acquainted with was not to be trusted. I know why now - they weren't to be trusted because he wanted me to not have any guidance or warnings - because he wanted to  be able to control me. Because when they came to me with what they saw him doing, I would doubt them, believe they just had it out for him for one reason or another.

As I look back, I still find it hard to believe I let myself be so controlled. I still am having some confidence and trust issues - hard to believe if you know me but it's true.

Getting there - little by little.

Debby reminded us at yoga last night: Give thanks for everyone that has been part of our life's journey. For all the lessons that we learned along the way, some easy, some hard, we are grateful. 

I'm grateful for the people in my life. I'm grateful for the experiences - good and bad because they make me who I am and who I will be.

Rough Seas

Tough Week and Birthday Thoughts

"I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship." - Louisa May Alcott

Last week held some tough moments - lots of them.

Let's just say, the books have been returned to their owner, along with the mail. And there was a DMV visit. (Aside: I wrote on a letter yesterday No Longer Lives Here)

Amazing and supportive friends and family got me through a rough couple of days.

I awoke Wednesday in a full-blown anxiety attack- not sure why. I found myself crying in the car and then sitting in a doctor's office waiting to take a test to see if I could still eat ice cream and I couldn't stop crying (not because of the fear of not being able to each ice cream, though thank goodness I can still!)

Maybe it was the books in my car. Maybe it was my upcoming birthday. Maybe it was the start of a full-blown mid-life crisis - oh won't I be fun if that's the case?

I sent messages to sisters Heather and Summer who were there for me immediately via the wonders of Facebook Messenger. True to form, they rallied and prayed and talked me through it. They told me stories of their anxiety. No judgment or eye rolling - just the best sisters. They are truly my good friends too.

I was never as anxious the rest of the day - I just struggled.

The next day, I bucked up and took matters into my own hands - I think. I sent a text - "let's go to the DMV. I'll be there at 10." I took the books and mail.

I warned friends.

I asked Kate, Jess, Tim, Heather and Summer to send me strength to deal with not only the emotional part but also anything he threw at me concerning a recent blog post or anything else. They did and perhaps I couldn't have handled any tough words so none were said. He brought a mutual friend who I was thrilled to see and it seemed a good buffer.

Feeling a lot better, a lot stronger, a lot more in control of me in this situation than I have before. I hope it sticks.

Still it was a emotionally draining. I went to my happy place on the island - the pier. Reached out to good friends - Kate, Julie visiting from Kentucky, Kristen visiting from Wisconsin and we got together for a drink, a visit, the beach.

Then we had family dinner at Jess and Chris and the cutenesses that are their children - with Kristen and a guest - my guest. Yay!

This week - my birthday week- also is proving to be filled with challenges and emotions.

Luckily I'm surrounded by good people. Strong people. Communicative people. Helpful people - from moving boats to borrowing tools to building kitchens. To listening to me whine, to teaching me to stand on my head and open my heart. To telling me to breath to cheering me on to telling me when I'm too much, to reading my blog. To just being the joyous lovely humans they are.

I hope I'm there for them like they are for me. I'm not the only one struggling these days, not the only one who has a tough day or a tough project or a mentally taxing work day. That's my birthday wish - to make sure I'm here for people like they are here for me.

I have certainly been a pretty needy friend lately.

It takes a village, some say. I believe it - even though I'm often trying to just do it myself. With my village, I can do anything.

The kitchen is next!

Small Projects

Little Efforts Can Make a Huge Difference

I'm so tired I can barely keep my eyes open - I have actually been that tired since about 8 p.m. But my Kentucky Wildcats were playing basketball and I was determined to do something small in the condo tonight. More than just changing the light bulb in the porch light, which I did last night.

Before the second half of the disappointing away game against LSU, I decided to change out the pocket door latch in the powder room. (It was that or sit and stew and scream while I watched the game. This way, I just listened and threw nothing at the television).

The latch arrived yesterday - one day to project seems pretty good progress to me. I was changing out an old brass latch with paint on it for a new dark bronze one that matches the faucet I installed.

Taking the old latch out was simple - two screws and the 3-piece latch practically fell out.

I pushed the latch onto the existing door cutout and realized it was backward - the lock hammer kept falling - it was upside down. That meant I had to unscrew each plate and switch them around so the hammer could be pulled up to open the door. Easy enough.

Then I batted the new latch into place and the screw holes were just slightly off - close enough that using a drill was all the work needed to put them in place.

There was one piece left I was trying to figure out where it went and what it was when a light bulb turned on over my head as if in a cartoon: the facing lock plate. The old one was painted over - by me no doubt - I hadn't noticed it.

Now there was trouble - the screws were stripped. I tried a few methods - drill, flat head screwdriver, the Force. I'm leaving it until tomorrow when I'm more awake and alert.

At least the main part of the project is complete. I like the look.

And now sleep.

Matches

Baggage

Still  So Much to Shed

I'm still getting some of his mail. I still have boxes of his books. There are still  many connections I need to sever.

I have a plan for the books - I'm going to plastic wrap the boxes and drop them off at his work boat or in his truck when I see it out like I did this morning - parked at a random house where I assume he doesn't have K - she's left once again with a woman he's dating and living with while he stays out all night. I hope this girl loves her like I did and that she's OK. It's none of my business anymore how he parents but I worry about K just the same.

Some friends say I should just donate the books and burn his mail - but that doesn't seem very healing for me - or very nice. Tempting - don't get me wrong - but I won't do that. I don't really think it will make me a better or more whole person.

My name is still on two of his titles - truck and sailboat. I can't take my name off without him being at the DMV with me.

Big baggage.

Turns out, there also are lots of small things left that feel huge.


There was the I.D. I wear on my running shoes that had his name and number on it as an emergency contact. I threw it away along with my worn-out running shoes while I was in Tennessee for Christmas.

On my desk was a silly trinket he made me from a set of green Mardi Gras beads when we first met. Threw it in the trash this morning. But do I keep the similar red one that K made for me and the tiny note she wrote one morning that just reads "Thanks."

I feel ridiculous sometimes - I'm way over him - but being rid of everything and unaffected by the relationship is a tough task. And being reminded how intricately connected we were because of all the baggage - big and small - begs so many questions about why and how and makes me want to close right up.

I'm going to try not to do that.

Making Every Mistake

Hot Water!

Someone commented the other day on my bathtub drain installation saying I could give him pointers as he remodels his new foreclosure condo. I responded that I very much could especially since I had made all the mistakes on every project I have completed. My home-improvement projects are a lot like my life. 

Tonight was no exception.

After work at the marina, I set about adjusting the hot water valve in the recently fixed and update main  bathroom shower. When I first turned it on, it was just lukewarm. This would not do - I'm a woman - I like my showers nearly scalding. It's a known fact.

I asked friend and plumber Chuck what could be done. He said he could come over again and adjust the valve inside the handle. I said "isn't this something I can do?" He said sure but didn't tell me how - to be fair, I was working and busy and neither of us really had time.

Google and YouTube to the rescue - again. 

Mistake No. 1: I didn't watch the entire video, which included my particular model second, before I started taking the handle apart. I took it apart about two steps too many. I figure it's a learning device - I now know what the rest of the insides look like. Ha ha.

This is where I should have stopped - at the valve that needs adjusting

I stopped here

Mistake No. 2: After going back two steps, I put the rotational limitation stop - the black plastic ring - on in the exact opposite position I wanted - so when I tested the water, it was still just lukewarm.
I only had to remove the screw again on the handle and adjust the ring again.  Then success! Hot hot water - I put the handle cover back on and voila!

A 5-minute project that took me 45 minutes. It's par for the course. But I did it and I feel pretty damn good about that.

Time to take shower. 

I'm Ready For You 2016

Getting It Done, Having Fun

2016 already feels like a better year, a new beginning. Looking and moving forward.

My Sunfish is going to get in the water - hopefully this week. I'm going to put it in, bang it up and learn to sail. Then I'll make her pretty.

There's a new plan for the kitchen - just slightly different but just enough to make a huge difference and to make it mine now, not ours.

Friends Brad and Mark are going to build it with me in the next two weeks when they are back in the area visiting.

This is going to happen.

We moved some things around today while all their kids were in my pool - and I used my miter saw - gingerly but I know what it feels like now. Not scared of it anymore.

Bought myself a new tool bag - feeling organized - and let's face it, like a bit of a bad ass for having so many tools I need it -- and they don't all fit!

I started today, the first day of 2016, by going to yoga  - a great way to start the day and the year. Debby talked about leaving everything from 2015 that was hurtful or unhappy behind. I believe I can do that now.

Last sunset of 2015

Rooting. Growing.