Friday, October 30, 2015

Is the Moon To Blame?

Something New and Weird EverydayMy life is honestly never boring. I can be completely alone and something will happen to make me laugh or need assistance - it's usually something ridiculous I have done unintentionally. I would love to be able to blame the moon - we have had some wild ones - full, red, new, eclipsed - with wild tides lately.

My friends are very aware of this talent I have.

Jess text this last night after I shared that I was out running and lost the key to my parents' house somewhere along the way, "Seriously Kyle ... How do you do this? It's an art maybe."
As I walked to retrace my 3+ miles, Kate followed up with, "Lol I'll say it again, you need a reality show."

It's true. And it's really no wonder people worry when I take on projects such as replacing a faucet or even hanging a picture. You should see the frightened looks I get when I mention I am going to change the electrical receptacles or that I now own two little sailboats. They seem certain I'm going to somehow kill myself.

I am the queen of mishaps and I am weird-accident prone. Not just accident prone, it has to be the most bizarre situation such as the time earlier this year that corrugated metal fell on the tops of my feet, cutting them to pieces. 


Health wise too - when my appendix went crazy, it was behind my intestines so it was harder to find and I didn't have regular symptoms. When my gallbladder stopped working, I didn't fit the profile, I was in severe pain, blood pressure through the roof. Doctors kept me in the hospital for a week trying 
to find out what was wrong. When surgeons decided to take the gallbladder, it was supposed to be a 45-minute surgery. For me, it was 3 1/2 hours.



Surprising even to me is the fact that I am coordinated in many ways - just not necessarily at the basics - walking for instance. I can run without falling on my head, play ice hockey, water ski, kayak, paddle board, swim, fish and just today I stood on my head. Yoga tripod anyway -  I was on my head, hands on the mat between my face and  my body, legs up on my arms, feet off the ground. Tripod.


I replaced a bathroom faucet without breaking anything or flooding the condo. I have changed my car battery by myself, along with fuses and headlights. I know how to find the knowledge even if it's something I have never done. And I'm generally not afraid. But it's never going to be right the first time - I have to do it twice, get my bracelet caught in the ratchet tie down, put the hockey net together backwards - things like that.


Sunday after our win

During the game
Because I can't just catch fish

Keeper snapper I didn't keep

For the next project

















That I found the key last night was amazing for anyone. Friend Tim gave an over-under of 80-20 to the bad. It was very me to actually find it, more me that I found it after completely retracing the 3 1/2 miles and then seeing it a few hundred yards from the house - at midnight.
It could be an art form - someone want to pay me for these spontaneous talents?
THE key

People blame the moon for bizarre crimes, wild behavior, mood swings.




Unfortunately for me - or fortunately since I like who I am - I can't hide behind the moon and her crazy ways. I have to own my mishaps, life events and actions - the good, the silly and the bad.

Upside down is good

Showing Tim the proper camping hat


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